angst, and also porn: the keys to a balanced diet

[forkedroad]

Annabelle has been combing the shelves, more excited than worried about the word of a planned attack tomorrow evening. Both she and Lauren were unable to sleep, though their nerves were alive for two totally different reasons. And she got it, she really did! She just didn't relate; Lauren was such a pessimistic worrywart, she and Susan constantly agreed.

She understood why, of course. She just didn't agree.

She's found and neatly stacked a couple of books on some magic she thinks will be useful, and she's already dreaming of the coin they'll be rewarded with for their heroics to this nice village. It's got lux, which she hasn't encountered with the Tanners much. It's not unaffordable, but kind of cushy; the fact that their inn has a dining hall, upstairs halls of rooms, and a library is a testament to the town's hospitality. The library is beautiful as well.

Annabelle turns a corner from behind a book shelf, catching Lauren. He's leaning over a desk, pouring thoughtfully into some text. She grins ear to ear, throwing herself beside him, elbows hitting the desk. Unlike Lauren, Annabelle is not blessed with elvish grace. She beams at him, looking just a hair beneath demonic.

"Fiiinally found yourself a good one, have you?" She leans towards him, bumping her shoulder against his. She's mostly bothering him because she's growing bored.

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[mylastchance]

Oh no, he can't be sure if she noticed it of course, but the flicker of eye movement is enough to make him feel self conscious about it. Then she says that and his eyes widen as he stares at her in shock.

"Read you some?"

[forkedroad]

"Yeah!" She answers simply, but with enthusiasm. Lauren's horrified reaction is just propelling her delight. "I can't very well read it myself. I mean, it's good, right?"

She can tell by, you know, the state of his pants.

Truthfully, she's only a little curious about the text—she's more curious about Lauren's reactions, and this fresh new opportunity to mess with him.

"You like it."

[mylastchance]

His eyes only grow wider, but then of course she has to point out his little, or perhaps not so little predicament. His closes his eyes, his nose crinkles distaste and he takes in a heavy breath. You like it. Oh... Fine then, he glares at her, before turning to the book once more. He begins to read aloud, but it's in elvish of course, the syllables are soft and strange to her and impossible to understand. Then he stops, working in his mind the proper common translation.

"Lady Seledine was not used to feeling self-conscious. A lady of her standing and beauty was always the center of attention. However, now Chizen looked at her with a different sort of gaze. Far from admiration or jealous, it was a look she'd never seen before on a man. He looked at her with lust. She did not think that he would be disgusted with her naked form now that she had revealed herself to him, but neither had she expected to see the desire written so plainly upon his face. And not just on his face either."

"His eyes followed her slender curves, admiring the slight curve of her... Breast and the way her... Her nipples grew hard in the cold..." He looks away as really he'd rather not continue.

"I'm... sure we could find you one to read..."

[forkedroad]

Annabelle is actually impressed when he reads it out loud, having not expected it—the Elvish is beautiful on the ears, and then she's further impressed that he translates it so articulately. Only clumsy at the...predictable parts.

She's never heard such words—and they embarrass her, but she's good at deflecting that kind of thing. Especially when there's someone else so much easier to embarrass present. She tilts her head, looking up at him, and crosses her ankles where she leans.

"The Elvish is so beautiful, though," she says sincerely, and she feels her face grow a little hot as she looks away. "I suppose it's fitting for that sort of story. I hadn't thought of it in that way before."

Or...uh, anything.

[mylastchance]

He hesitates, not sure what to make of her response. He's never seen her react quite like this before. Of course they had stories like this in every language, so whether or not it was particularly suited to elvish he couldn't say, but that isn't the statement that catches his attention.

"What do you mean you hadn't thought of it before?"

[forkedroad]

"I mean..."

She shrugs one shoulder, uncomfortable with her own bashfulness. She tries to shake it off, but she can't look at him quite yet.

"I don't suppose I would have any reason to, you know? Elvish is unfamiliar to me; I wouldn't have thought of it used in... that sort of context, is all."

She's choosing her words very carefully. Good job, Annabelle.

[mylastchance]

He shrugs a bit, looking away.

"I mean every language has those kinds of words." He looks back to her, and sees how she's avoiding looking at him. It makes him feel a bit more comfortable, being so embarrassed himself honestly.

"Elvish can be used in just as many contexts as common can really." The elvish sentence flows easily from his tongue. It's a language he's known all his life and very easy to slip into.

[forkedroad]

She's heard it before, of course. She likes hearing Susan and Lauren talk to each other in Elvish, sometimes, though it's not all the time.

She laughs a little, shaking her head. "I'm going to ignore what I don't understand," she clarifies, and resumes.

"I just mean that..."

She steeples her fingers, rolling her eyes. She seems to be at a rare loss for words, trying to explain her feelings.

"...Elvish is a romantic sounding language, so it makes sense. I wouldn't have expected it to be so well suited."

She's managed to find eye contact again.

[mylastchance]

It is rare, but it makes the moment somehow private or special to Lauren. He watches her try to explain herself and sees the way she moves her hands and how her body language shifts. Did Elvish sound romantic? He'd never thought so, but then again, he'd always grown up hearing it.

"Should I speak in Elvish around you more often?" he asks, smiling softly. Perhaps she'd enjoy getting that romantic experience?

[forkedroad]

"No," she answers immediately, unthinkingly, then laughs, shaking her head as she covers her face for a moment. "I mean, the amount you do when you do is fine!"

She straightens up, struggling for her composure. It's funny, and she isn't a sore loser.

She rests her elbows on the clean marble surface, glancing at Lauren, now leaning back on the desk. Her lip curls a little.

"That backfired," she admits with a laugh. "That's what I get for attacking on unfamiliar soil, I s'pose."

[mylastchance]

He laughs too. He wasn't even aware this was a challenge. This was just Annabelle being her ridiculous self. Of course the words unfamiliar territory make him color again, but just a bit. Of course he knew he wasn't supposed to read this kind of books, but it was here and it was written and published, so that means someone besides him must have read at some point. Still, he isn't surprised that someone isn't Annabelle.

"It guess it's more common to be unfamiliar with these kind of books than it is to be familiar with them." he admits reluctantly, marking his page before closing the novel. He knew it wasn't acceptable, but well, he'd be lying if he said he never thought about the types of things that had been written about in books like this.

"...I guess I was curious."

[forkedroad]

Annabelle doesn't think it's unacceptable, but it's unfamiliar.

"I think that's true more depending on one's age and worldliness," she contests.

Her eyes fall around her knees, and she kind of fiddles with the hem of her oversized sweater. She looks off to the side, rolling her eyes about the room, and glances back at Lauren.

"Seems natural to me," she says. "for a young man to be curious." She pauses, seeming to gain some of her confidence back. She grins at Lauren.

"What curiosities have you?"

[mylastchance]

For a young man, but not for a young lady. He notices the distinction and pushes him just that inch towards uncomfortable again. Of course all hope of composure is lost when she idly asks about his curiosities.

"Well... I've rarely, that is to say I never... I mean. Just the usual sort I suppose." he winces at his own poor wording.

[forkedroad]

She smiles with her teeth, shaking her head.

"I don't know what that entails," she says sincerely. She's never been preoccupied with those sort of thoughts, before—and she isn't right now either, exactly. But being around someone who is actively and presently supercharged with sexual energy is... influential, almost.

She just wonders about his perspective, and how he must be feeling, and how all he feels with this sort of thing to begin with. After all, Lauren's the only same age friend she's had since becoming adolescent.

"What there is to be curious about... Bodies, I guess?" She tilts her head, eyeing Lauren up and down with an inquisitive lean, purely to fuck with him. "Pleasure?"

[mylastchance]

And just like that his wilting boner is brought back to rigid life. He leans back away from her, as though afraid she might attack him. His eyes flick down, traveling over her body before he returns to meet her gaze once more. His face is red once more.

"Bodies... a bit I guess." She was right though in her teasing. It was mostly the pleasure of it that caught his attention. He didn't know what it felt like to do something like that with a woman, but of course he wanted to. Though he wouldn't say no to having a more intimate idea of what a woman's body actually looked like. He swallows hard, forcing himself to look away, it wasn't right to imagine such things about his friend just because she was here and because he was... Well because he was her friend.

"...Anna... I.. I think..." he mumbles, trailing off as he tries to think of a polite way to excuse himself from the situation. He can't think of any excuse though, and he saw the way she looked him up and down, part of his brain is telling him that's something. If he really was curious he could stick around, right? There wasn't any harm in talking with a friend, was there? He falls quiet, glancing back at her shyly.

[forkedroad]

Annabelle may not understand this type of thing very well, but she's a curious, sharp and quick learner. She feels something in the air; electrifying and strange. New. She's pretty sure it's all Lauren's energy—she can feel it almost viscerally. Of course, even if it was a different kind of energy, Annabelle was already on a giddy, high vibration with the promise of commotion and potential glory to come. When he glances at her sheepishly, she holds his gaze. But her expression is warm, rather than piercing and mischievous. There's still a glint of that impishness in her eyes, but it's behind general receptiveness. She knows his shyness keeps him at few words, and she's trying to coax him a little bit open.

"You think...?" she implores. She can sense his discomfort, and his arousal is obvious and thus not worth presently mentioning... but he hasn't stormed off yet. She feels like maybe he's trying to trust her; he's being vulnerable with her.

[mylastchance]

It's grounding, her gaze, and the warmth of it does a fair bit to settle his nerves. She wasn't just teasing him, although he had no doubt that was at least half the reason they were talking about this. He thinks they should stop, is what he was going to say, but what exactly should they be stopping? He swallows, clearly uncomfortable, but she's right, he has no intention of running off.

"You've really never wondered about those kinds of things?"

[forkedroad]

"Not exactly," she answers, after a brief pause. "I've often wondered how other people feel about it—men; other women; virgins and whores. I suppose because I haven't experienced a lot of it myself, I wonder... But it's informed by curiosity, and not my own desire."

She feels self conscious admitting it. She suddenly coils a wirey, dark curl of hair around her finger in a rare, anxious gesture. "...I sometimes feel that I want to understand. I feel like I'm—" She can't find the words exactly. She drops her head with a little chuckle, raising her palm. "—defective, maybe. Sexually."

[mylastchance]

He frowns, but somehow finds himself relaxing as the topic strays further away from his own curiosities. Admittedly sexuality isn't really something he's ever given much thought. He knew he wanted a partner, he knew he sometimes found men as attractive as woman. Other than that he wasn't sure what else he needed to know. It was simple, wasn't it, just instinct really. It's hard for him to think of about it being different for someone else. He had a hard time imagining someone not feeling the same kinds of desires he did, but only because it was such a common feeling for him. That didn't mean he thought there was something wrong with the lack of it.

He watches Anna, it's rare to see her nervous. He reaches out to take her hand in his. "You're not defective."

[forkedroad]

She's a little surprised when he takes her hand. She hadn't meant to make it sound so serious. She was trying to have humor about her insecurity, but she supposes because they're rare in the first place, it seems like a big deal.

Also, she feels something jolt through her when he touches her hand. It surges through her, hitting and blooming in her pelvis. Her pupils dialate a little, and she lifts her head to look at Lauren, almost confused, her expression searching. Then, she smiles slowly.

"Hm."

She tilts her head, elongating the look of her neck.

"You're right."

[mylastchance]

It's so... Flirtatious. His eyes trail down her neck, and briefly his mind wonders what it would be like to suck on it. He hurriedly shuffles the image away, but it's clear the composure he'd gained just a moment ago is gone. It confuses him that she would act this way. He knew he must have been imagining any... Interest... She might be trying to communicate, especially considering what she'd just said. Still, the way she looked at him, the way she pressed into his space, the way she tilted her head, there was something intoxicating about it. Was his own mind so turned around from his own desire that he was interpreting the innocent gestures of a friend as something else? Or was she really doing it on purpose? As though to tease him for his own desires.

The thought stings, and it's hard not to think he's being toyed with. He wants to give her the benefit of the doubt, but why would she keep looking at him like that if she didn't feel desire unless she wanted him to respond. Unless it really was all in his head. Her body language was just... Confusing.

"I don't know what you want from me..."

[forkedroad]

She's not sure how to answer that. She doesn't even exactly know—she's just speaking her truths as they come with no real intention than to learn and communicate. Her body language is confusing because, well... she's confused.

"I don't know either," she admits. "But... I think, I..." She feels a flutter of nervousness that makes her chuckle almost breathlessly. She glances back at him. "I feel like I might be attracted to you, right now. I feel something. Like ...your desire is contagious."

[mylastchance]

He has no idea what to even say to that. Was she some kind of empath? Was he manipulating her mind on accident just by being turned on?!

"I'm... Sorry?"

annabelle. an empath. cackles

[forkedroad]

It's very rare that Annabelle feels mortification—but Lauren's response garners it, and she flushes abruptly. She's so sheltered in her own comfort zone that when something manages to get to her, it always leaves her shocked—but she also almost likes it. It's an indication of learning, and she's happy she can learn things from Lauren.

Even if, right now, it's super embarrassing. This situation has shed light on Lauren's tendency to be as far from candid as possible.

"N-no," she stammers, her composure shaking away. "No, it's fine! It's not your fault," she says with a short, airy laugh, and she drops her head again, pushing her fingers back through her wild hair to clear her vision. "It's mine."

excuse you he is super candid

[mylastchance]

Oh, no. He hadn't meant to embarrass her. He can tell he's bothered her though, even if he doesn't necessarily understand the reasons why. This is odd, and confusing, for both of them. And well, she said herself she didn't know what was happening so that meant they were both in the same boat here. Right?

Her hand is still in his and he squeezes it tighter for just a moment. She really is attractive to him. Maybe others wouldn't think so, but to Lauren the thing that was always most attractive about someone was there ability to be themselves. Annabelle was always very much herself and that was always something Lauren had very much admired about her.

"Anna..." he murmurs, trying to catch her attention. When she looks to him he hesitates only a moment before leaning into give her a kiss.